Valentines Day Funny & Humorous Sayings for Him and Her

Valentines Day Funny & Humorous Sayings for Him and Her

Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!! Every one of us loves to have fun. But if you are lucky enough to have fun with your boyfriend or girlfriend, then your joy has no bounds. During such situations, you could see the real you. All naughty things come out during such times which you didn’t ever notice you have them.

Here are few naughty and funny deeds of all lovely girls and boys. Writing funny valentines day sayings in greeting cards for your lover, scribbling on your boyfriend’s outfit with your lipstick, sprinkling water on your girlfriend, driving the vehicle too fast to make her hold you tight, etc. The list keeps going on……….

Happy Valentines Day Images With Roses for Her

Besides this, many would write some funny valentines day sayings in the whatsapp message or email message for their partner. All such folks hopefully would surf the web for some cool collection of stuff related to funny valentines day sayings. To help all such folks, here we have shared few impressive collection of funny valentines day sayings. Scroll down to view them all. Feel free to use them as well as share them online with your friends and followers.

Valentines Day Funny Sayings for Him

  • Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are. Happy Valentine’s Day Honey!
  • I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Happy Valentine’s Day!!!
  • Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
  • Women are made to be loved, not understood. – Oscar Wilde
Valentines Day Sayings Funny

Valentines Day Sayings Funny

  • Love is like a lost fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably shit. Happy Valentine’s Day!!!
  • My husband thinks I’m crazy, however he’s the one who married me. Happy Valentine’s Day my love!!!

Valentines Day Animated Ecards for a Special Friend

  • When YOU’RE not with me A PAIN runs through my heart I’D KILL to be with YOU! Happy Valentine’s Day baby!
  • I know they say there’s plenty of fish in the sea, but I think you’re my NEMO. Happy Valentine’s Day my love!
  • You may have history with her but you have chemistry with me. Happy Valentine’s Day!!!
  • If you feel sad that you stay alone during Valentine‘s day, just remember that nobody loves you on any of those other 355 days of the year. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • If you‘re alone during Valentine’s Day, it is priceless for you. Otherwise you would spend a few hundred dollars.
  • To comfort your sister if she’s alone during Valentine’s Day, you may say: 80 percent of my socks are single but I have never seen them crying because of that. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.Valentine’s Day Jokes

Happy Valentines Day Images for Whatsapp Dp

  • The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
  • When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
  • Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  • A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
  • A little boy asked his father, ‘Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?’ And the father replied, ‘I don’t know, son, I’m still paying for it.

Happy Valentines Day Glitter Images for Girlfriend

  •  A couple was having a discussion about family finances. Finally the husband exploded, ‘If it weren’t for my money, the house wouldn’t be here!’ The wife replied, ‘My dear, if it weren’t for your money, I wouldn’t be here. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • I wanted to make it really special on Valentine’s Day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV. – Tracy Smith
  • My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn’t want him to. – Rita Rudner
  • One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry. – Oscar Wilde
  • The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead. – Ann Landers – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!

Happy Valentines Day Special Couple Images

  • Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house. – Groucho Marx
  • Valentine’s day has gotten blown way out of proportion. Valentine’s Day just used to be for your girlfriend or your wife but now everyone’s like ‘Oh, happy valentine’s day!’ I even got a Valentine’s Day card from my grandmother. How ridiculous is that? We stopped having sex years ago! – Greg Giraldo – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • February is a month of months, and there is one special day: Valentine’s Day on the 14th. I know it’s still a ways off, but I just can’t wait. Janice, if you’re watching, will you make me the happiest man in the world and get out of my apartment? – Ed Helms
Valentines Day Sayings Funny

Valentines Day Sayings Funny

  • Every year, girls are like, ‘This is the year I get diamonds!’ And guys are like, ‘This is the year I get a blowjob!’ Everybody’s disappointed.- Aisha Tyler – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!

Happy Valentines Day Romantic Images Free Download

  • Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in. – Richard Jeni
  • Love thy neighbor — and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier. – Mae West
  • Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. – Albert Einstein
  • A youth with his first cigar makes himself sick. A youth with his first girl makes everybody sick. – Mary Wilson
  • I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it? – Jean Illsley Clarke
  • I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. – Rita Rudner – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. – Unknown Source
  • Love; A temporary insanity curable by marriage. – Ambrose Bierce

Happy Valentines Day Greetings for Him

  • My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes. – Emo Philips – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!

Funny Valentines Day Sayings for Her

  • Stop waiting for your prince charming. Get up, dress up and find him. The poor idiot may be stuck in a tree or something.
  • My love, remember that you will never lose anything by loving. But you will end up losing by holding back. Happy Valentine’s Day!
  • You have held my hand through all the tough times, my love. I know I could not make it without you. So thank you for that, Happy Valentine’s Day! I love you.

Cute Valentine’s Day Card Sayings

  • Your breath is the scent of a rose and your voice is the melody of angels, while your eyes are more precious than jewels. I love you, Happy Valentine’s Day!
Valentines Day Sayings Funny

Valentines Day Sayings Funny

  • Love will never be a promise of a rose garden, unless it will be showered with water of sincerity, air of passion and light of faith. Happy Valentine’s Day, honey!
  • Curved up in the mountain and covered deep in dew. I saw these three words… I LOVE YOU! Happy Valentine’s Day! – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • Grow old with me the best is yet to be! – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!

Funny Happy Valentines Day Messages for Best Friends

  • I’m not sure which is worse.. Missing you, or the fact that there’s nothing i can do about it.
  • The Best way to kill yourself is to love somebody truly and you will die daily.
  • Love is like a fart if you have to force it, it’s probably shit. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • I love you with all my butt,
    I would say Heart But my butt is bigger. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • A boy’s sleepy voice is seriously the sexiest shit ever. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!

Evergreen Happy Valentines Day Greetings Images

  • A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve is extracted. – Helen Rowland
  • A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him. – Brendan Francis
  • Absence: that common cure of love. – Miguel De Cervantes
  • Falling in love is so hard on the knees.- Aerosmith
  • If I had a penny for everything I love about you, I would have many pennies. – Ogie,Waitress
  • If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? – Author Unknown
  • It’s better to have loved and lost than to do forty pounds of laundry a week. – Laurence J. Peter
  • I’ve been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she’ll kill me. – Henny Youngman

Printable Valentines Day Cards for Boyfriend

  • Lord! I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing. – Jonathon Swift
  • Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. – Cathy Carlyle
  • Love is like an hour glass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties. – Jules Renord
  • Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species. – W. Somerset Maugham
  • Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. – Woody Allen
  • Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock. – John Barrymore
  • Love is the only shocking act left on the planet. – Reed Bennett
  • Love lasteth as long as the money endureth. – William Caxton
  • Money will buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail. – Richard Friedman
  • Never sign a Valentine with your own name. – Charles Dickens

Special Valentines Day Status for Whatsapp

  • No, this trick won’t work. How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love? – Albert Einstein
  • Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy. – Henry Kissinger
  • True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. – Erich Segal
  • We don’t believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack. – Marie E. Eschenbach
  • You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it. – Henny Youngman

Valentines Day Card Messages for Girlfriend

  • Everyone says you only fall in love once, but that’s not true because every time I see you, I fall in love all over again. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!
  • For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul. -Judy Garland quotes
  • No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you. After all, you’re the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from the inside. – Valentines Day Sayings Funny!!!

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